Was it hard to give the baby up?

I’ve been asked this question many times since Milo was born.  My response is always the same: Nope, not even a little bit.  Milo was never my baby.  I didn’t give him up.  I gave him back.

I didn’t develop a maternal connection to Milo during the pregnancy.  I felt towards him the way I feel about my friends’ babies or the kids that I used to baby sit.  I cared about him and I wanted to protect him but I didn’t feel the way I felt when carrying my own children.

And I didn’t have that crazy rush of emotion when he was born like I did with my own children.  When R laid Milo on my chest, my heart didn’t explode with love.  I didn’t fall head over heels for this tiny little person.  But I watched as R and E did.  I watched as their hearts exploded with love.  I watched as they fell head over heels.  And in the midst of that special moment, E turned to me, teary eyed, and mouthed thank you.  I’ll never, ever forget that moment.  Nor will I forget the emotional hugs and the joy that we all shared at Milo’s birth.

What I did feel when Milo was born was incredibly happy and incredibly proud.  My dream of helping a family through surrogacy has finally come true. I did it!  These awesome dads now have a son, and their daughter now has a brother, their families now have a new grandson, a nephew, a cousin….I played a huge part in making that happen.  When Milo’s grandma arrived in town after the birth, she gave me the biggest hug and expressed such gratitude to me. I helped bring joy and happiness to this family.  I’m so proud and honored to have been able to do so.

This experience was simply amazing and we now share a very special connection with our friends across the the globe.  ❤️

I would do it all over again in a heartbeat!  In fact, my OB has cleared me to do another journey…so hopefully I get the chance to!

“If you have the power to make someone else happy, you should do it.  The world needs more of that.”